When guilt sets into your heart, it feels as if you might never be free from this emotion. That, of course, is just an illusion because guilt is in your head. It's a feeling that settles in when you didn't follow your heart or when you misidentify the boundaries of your responsibility. You are not responsible for everyone or everything in the world. You are responsible for yourself, your feelings and how you choose to deal with your actions.
Determining the type of guilt you are carrying
The first thing you need to do to get rid of guilt is determine what type of guilt you are carrying around with you. If you did something to someone that hurt that person, you are dealing with one type of guilt. If you are feeling guilt because of what someone else is living or not living is the second type of guilt. And finally, the guilt we all feel that we are still alive when we have lost a loved one is a different guilt all together. Once you can identify which type of guilt you have, you can then determine your level of responsibility in the act.
Determining responsibility
The next step is to determine who's responsible for the action/non-action. Guilt can crop up from taking an action that hurt someone or from not taking the right action on your part. Or are you feeling guilty for something you couldn't prevent or cannot change? Many times, the boundaries of who's responsible for what or whom are easily crossed. Are you feeling guilty for the life that a loved one is living, one that you cannot do anything to change? Is that person living a situation that is of their own choice or responsibility. Often times we feel guilty for not being a better parent or for the failures of our children. While we have our part in their lives, ultimately, everyone has freedom of choice. We can all choose to empower or disempower ourselves from any given circumstance. Finally, how responsible are you for the death of another person, especially if it was an accident? Many times we aren't responsible for a car accident, an illness but for some reason taking on that guilt feels like the right feeling to embrace. But it isn't.
Letting go - Forgiving yourself
At some point you have to let go of the feeling guilt. Guilt will eat you up and drain you of all your energies. You have to forgive yourself for your mistake, action or non-action. Then you can begin to heal.
Begin by forgiving yourself for the situation, the result, the outcome. Then apologize, in person or talk to the person's spirit, memory or energy. Accept that it happened. It's time to move on.
Many things had to happen before the guilty act could be committed. Learn from this lesson. You will grow. Learn from this life lesson and move forward with the intention to not make this mistake again, become conscious of the 'what' and 'whys' behind your actions.
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