Getting to the Core Issue With EFT: Anger and Rage

Why do some people habitually react with anger and rage to all kinds of situations? It could be something physical, like a brain injury or some other neurological problem. Most often, anger and rage is seen in people who have been violated, trapped, or stopped from being who they are or doing what theyneeded to do. They've been in situations where they don't see a choice or don't see a way out of a horrible or emotionally painful situation. Among many other things, this can include physical or sexual abuse or seeing others abused; experiencing a natural disaster, such as a tornado, earthquake or tsunami; or being kidnapped or held hostage. This kind of emotional pain often creates symptoms of PTSD.

It's Either Depression or Rage

It makes sense that, when we experience horrible things that we have no power to change or stop, we either despair and get depressed, or we get really angry - or both. These are all survival mechanisms. We need to do something with the feeling of utter helplessness so that we can survive it physically and emotionally.

PTSD

Living in a long-term helpless situation-such as children who are physically and sexually abused or who see one of their parents or siblings being harmed in this way-has long-term effects that stay in our bodies and nervous systems. That feeling of horror, powerlessness and helplessness is always there, either on the surface or underneath. That's also true of one-time events, such as the natural disasters or the kinds of horrible experiences I mentioned above. This is what's called PTSD, or Post-traumatic Stress Disorder. Whenever something happens that has even a small flavor of the original events, it "triggers," or evokes, the whole, huge awful feeling again. And the reaction to this can be anger or rage.

Rage is Survival, But It Costs Us

Although we can see that anger and rage originally served as a means of survival, if it keeps on coming up in a person, the cost is huge! It wrecks close relationships, it makes people lose their jobs, and it hurts! Each time someone gets triggered and goes through rage, they're traumatized all over again. The traumatic stress-all that fear, helplessness, trapped feeling-has again flooded the person. All that adrenaline floods the person again and again. This can lead to a number of stress diseases.

EFT Helps With PTSD Anger and Rage

I've had a lot of clients who have some level of anger where they're holding emotional pain from the past. EFT Tapping is usually very helpful in healing from PTSD and calming the body and nervous system, so that previously triggering experiences are more like distant pictures. The painful PTSD reaction is gone!

Zoe Zimmermann, MA, LPC is a Certified EFT Practitioner and long-time licensed psychotherapist. She uses EFT Tapping as her modality for fast breakthroughs with core issues and specializes in clients who suffer with PTSD from accidents, surgeries, abuse, dysfunctional family dynamics, other traumas and physical pain.

EFT is an exceptionally effective energy psychology and alternative therapy, where EFT Tapping on acupuncture meridian pressure points is used to take emotional charge out of traumatic and painful memories and experiences, often alleviating pain.

Zoe conducts in-person, phone or Skype sessions. Schedule a session now by calling 303-444-1195 or visit Zoe Zimmermann's website.

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Finding the Root of an Issue With EFT: Low Self Esteem

Many times, when we're working on an issue with a lot of emotional pain-or physical pain-and it's not clearing, it can be because we're not being specific enough. You can look at it like peeling an onion, except this onion has a treasure in the very center-the core issue. If you stay on the level of the peel or the outer layers, you don't get to the treasure, and the issue doesn't get resolved.

Low Self Esteem

For example, "low self esteem" can be seen as an "umbrella" that spans over a number of core events. Anyone with low self esteem knows it's real and knows when they're feeling it. However, in any kind of psychotherapy, including EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques), if we stay with just talking about or EFT Tapping on "low self esteem," nothing seems to change-or the change is very slow.

What Does Low Self-Esteem Consist of?

Let's start by peeling one layer off the onion, going from the umbrella to what low self esteem may be made up of? Just guessing, here are some possibilities:
I feel like I'm often wrong in how I think or what I say or how I actI feel like I AM wrong or bad, in my essenceI put myself down a lot; self criticismI feel ashamedI feel that I shouldn't have been bornI imagine others thinking badly of meI believe I can't do anything right, or that I often fail at what I try

An EFT Concept: Getting to the Core Issue

Zooming in on the above points, we can get to the core issue, through core events. Just picking one from above-"I feel ashamed"-let's think about when you tend to feel that way. Some possibilities:
When I make a mistake at work and my boss noticesWhen I slip on the ice and fallWhen my hair doesn't work out right in the morningWhen a friend tells me I don't care about them because I didn't notice something about themWhen my spouse or partner gets angry because I didn't respond correctly when they told me something about themselvesAnd on and on and on

Now we're getting to something more specific!

Getting to the Core Event

Usually with something as big as self esteem, it started in childhood, with specific childhood trauma, specific childhood events, or patterns of events. So, picking one of the things from above--let's say, your spouse or partner getting angry-ask yourself, when have I felt this specific kind of shame around someone getting angry when I didn't listen or respond correctly? For example, I've had clients whose parent suddenly got angry and told them they were selfish or purposely rebellious or bad. The child had no idea what she/he had done. When we go back to the event, it often turns out that the parent was often in a bad mood and the child happened to be there and didn't help them with whatever was bothering them. So they yelled at the child, putting them down for not noticing that the floor was dirty. Or the child needed something when the parent was trying to sleep or whatever. In any case, it usually had little or nothing to do with what the child was doing. Nor could the child-because it was a child-solve whatever was bothering the parent. You can see that childhood emotional abuse creates long-term emotional pain.

Criticism Creates Shame Creates Low Self Esteem

Nevertheless, this kind of criticism and shaming creates what we experience as the umbrella, low self esteem. Each time it happens is lumped onto the other times and now, whenever something happens that has even a flavor of the specific emotional pain that was created in the original events, the shame and low self esteem is there in the same intense way it was in childhood.

EFT Tapping Can Heal Low Self Esteem

When you can get to core events and use EFT Tapping on the feelings that arise when you remember specific parts of specific events, you're actually working on a core issue.Often, it will resolve and your day-to-day life will change. It's amazing how such horrible experiences as childhood sexual abuse, childhood physical abuse or other trauma that contributes to low self-esteem can often be healed relatively working with a psychotherapist that is adept at EFT.

Zoe Zimmermann, MA, LPC is a Certified EFT Practitioner and long-time licensed psychotherapist. She uses EFT Tapping as her modality for fast breakthroughs with core issues and specializes in clients who suffer with PTSD from accidents, surgeries, abuse, dysfunctional family dynamics, other traumas and physical pain.

EFT is an exceptionally effective energy psychology and alternative therapy, where EFT Tapping on acupuncture meridian pressure points is used to take emotional charge out of traumatic and painful memories and experiences, often alleviating pain.

Zoe conducts in-person, phone or Skype sessions. Schedule a session now by calling 303-444-1195 or visit Zoe Zimmermann's website.

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Getting to the Core Issue: EFT for Emotional Effects of Accidents

You might think it's obvious what the core issue is when you're working on healing pain from an accident-it's the accident! However, for two reasons, it may not be all that obvious. One is that sometimes PTSD from accidents triggers PTSD from previous emotional trauma. Another is that, although the accident might indeed be the core issue, it's important to get really detailed and specific when working with the accident.

What Causes Accident PTSD

Almost anyone who goes through an accident or any high speed injury, there are a number of parts to it: there are sudden sights, sounds, body reactions, emotions, smells, etc. Most of them happen so fast that we can't assimilate them. Our reactions start but don't have a chance to complete. All of that stays in our nervous system and our body. That's what we know as PTSD-all these stuck, incomplete reactions and all this emotional pain and physical pain.

EFT With Accident PTSD

To heal this kind of PTSD with EFT Tapping (or with any method), it's important to divide the accident into emotional parts. If the intensity of our emotional pain around it is so high that we get really agitated or even spacy, dizzy or floaty thinking about it, we first need to do some EFT Tapping in general without even thinking about any of the details-to lower the intensity. After that, pick out the most intense parts, notice what emotion(s) are attached to each part, and tap on the emotions. For instance, if the sound of breaking glass brings up fear, specifically tap on that sound and the fear around it. Then go through each part of the accident that brings up a spike of intensity, always asking what about that part brings up the intensity and what emotion it brings up, and EFT Tapping on both.

Accidents Can Trigger Past Traumatic Stress

Sometimes, when I'm working with clients on emotional pain and/or physical pain after an accident, there's a certain amount of relief, but it doesn't go all the way. Often this is because their unconscious emotional/physical reactions during the accident triggered PTSD from a previous trauma. One client, for instance, felt he was going to die during an accident and he had the floaty, spacy feeling that can accompany that. This triggered a time in his life where he was very depressed and wanted to die. We had to work on the earlier time in order to completely heal the accident PTSD.

EFT Tapping for All Kinds of Emotional Pain Issues

EFT is very effective for healing emotional pain and often physical pain caused by accidents. I've had a number of clients whose PTSD symptoms are gone after three to six sessions. EFT is also very effective in alleviating pain due all kinds of stressful and traumatic experiences.

Zoe Zimmermann, MA, LPC is a Certified EFT Practitioner and long-time licensed psychotherapist. She uses EFT Tapping as her modality for fast breakthroughs with core issues and specializes in clients who suffer with PTSD from accidents, surgeries, abuse, dysfunctional family dynamics, other traumas and physical pain.

EFT is an exceptionally effective energy psychology and alternative therapy, where EFT Tapping on acupuncture meridian pressure points is used to take emotional charge out of traumatic and painful memories and experiences, often alleviating pain.

Zoe conducts in-person, phone or Skype sessions. Schedule a session now by calling 303-444-1195 or visit Zoe Zimmermann's website.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Zoe_Zimmermann

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The Issue of Weight

Have you ever just wanted to smack someone for the words that flew out of their mouth? I have - especially when people focus on the issue of my weight. When you are living with CF (or any disease for that matter), you hear it all. Sentences like these fly out of people's mouths all the time without a second thought:

"You look good - last time I saw you, you looked pretty chubby!"

"I liked how you looked when you were taking birth control - you had some chubbiness in your face then!"

"Eat something - you're so thin! Turn sideways and you almost disappear!"

"Gee, it must be nice to eat anything you want and look like that!"

*SMACK!*

Ok, I didn't really smack anyone. In fact, in each circumstance, I think I bit my tongue and pasted a smile on my face and answered as politely as possible, "thanking" them for the "compliment", or just walked away. Inside though, I was close to tears and seriously offended. How dare they speak those words! They have no idea what my life is like or how I feel or how I struggle! And by the way, make up your mind, am I chubby or am I skinny?!

Have you ever felt that way?

Last week I asked the following question on Facebook, and I was overwhelmed by the responses that came pouring in.

How does it make you feel when people focus on how much weight you've gained or lost?

Here are some of the answers that you gave:

"Well when people focus on dumb stuff like that. I don't know whether to pity them or laugh at them for being so shallow."

"Whenever I see my family they mention something about my weight. It makes me sad."

"Personally, it drives me crazy when the doctor congratulates me on gaining weight. Didn't you tell me to lose weight last month? Pick a direction already!"

"I love it when the diabetes doctors and the CF doctors give me completely contradictory advice on what to eat and how much. I try not to get too bent out of shape because it doesn't do anything but stress me out."

"When people comment on my daughter's weight, it makes me feel like a horrible mom."

The truth is the opinions of others can really hurt. They can keep us stuck in a world of confusion and self-hate because we just can't seem to measure up to what everyone else expects. But there's hope! Let me share with you some tips that have really helped me overcome this debilitating setback.

1. Feed Your Mind with Truth

We are told in the Bible to "focus on what is good and what is true." (Philippians 4:8) So...what is good in your life? What is the truth about YOU?

Here's some truth for you. Your size does not change your value or your worth. YOU are amazing and beautiful just the way you are! You were not made for a life of sickness and disease; in fact, you were designed to be a light and inspire others with your strength and tenacity. Whether you are tiny, large, or the perfect weight according to medical statistics, YOU are beautiful!

Sadly, many times we hear the opposite day in and day out. People speak without thinking how their words will affect us. Many of them mean well and think they are actually helping us, and some of them may even be a little jealous so they give us a "compliment" that comes out wrapped in sarcasm. The bottom line is it hurts. And at the end of the day, the only person you are stuck listening to over and over again is yourself.

Somebody said it perfectly today on social media, "Weight seems to be everyone's issue. No one will ever be truly satisfied with themselves unless they tackle what they see in the mirror and say to themselves "I am beautiful! I love my body! God loves me and thinks I'm beautiful too!"

Changing the tape that plays inside your head is going to take some time and persistence. Don't know where to start? I highly suggest you plug into mentors like Dani Johnson and Sandi Krakowski. Listen to them often! I listen to each of them several times a week, and if I'm struggling with my own internal radio station (i.e. my thoughts) I listen three to four hours a day!

Listen while you're sleeping, while you're making dinner, getting ready for the day, driving the kids to school, picking the kids up... and listen in a closed room with a notebook and pen. Feed your mind the TRUTH DAILY! Overcoming CF, weight issues, and other diseases depends heavily on your frame of mind.

2. Pay Attention to What Your Body Is Telling You

You are the only person who really knows your body. Have you ever been told that? Many times, when we are living with CF and disease, we depend so heavily on reports from doctors that we forget to listen to our own bodies. Your body is speaking to you. What is it saying?

Are you tired and weak? Are you constantly getting headaches or colds? If so, that's your body trying to tell you something!

If you've recently changed your eating habits and started exercising, what is your body telling you now? You might find that you have more energy and you are stronger. You might also find that because of all the running, you lost some weight. How do you feel about that? Doctors and family members will have their own opinions and suggestions and even fears, but the reality is this: YOU are the one living in your body. YOU know how you feel!

Right now, let's take a quick journey down a side street, shall we? Grab a pen and paper and write down the answer to this question: How do I measure the quality of my life?

If you answer that question with "having more energy to do the things that I want to do and need to do," then stand up for that answer and walk proudly in how you look and feel. You are the only one who knows how strong your body is and what makes you feel better or worse so pay attention to what your body is telling you!

3. Forgive Those Who Have Said Hurtful Things to You

Ouch. This one hurts a little, doesn't it? You're probably thinking things like:

"I don't want to forgive them! They should apologize to me first!"

This is how we feel when we've been hurt by people, whether they are family, friends, or even medical professionals. The truth is we keep ourselves in bondage when we don't forgive them. That bondage can often make us sick, thus prolonging the healing that is waiting for us. Unforgiveness can keep our bodies from moving toward a healthier lifestyle and it traps our minds from seeing the truth of who we really are.

Maybe you're wondering how I can identify with you and know so much about this. I've walked this painful, beautiful road, myself. I've had to forgive many people for words they've said to me about my weight and how I look. Up until six months ago, I didn't believe I was beautiful because I believed and dwelled on the words that others spoke over me. I felt amazing, had more energy than I ever had before, was running further than I ever had before, and yet... no one seemed to celebrate that with me. They all seemed to focus on the little bit of weight that I had lost because of my new found energy. It wasn't until I started implementing these three tips that things began to change. Today, I feel confident of who I am, how I look, and how I feel.

There's hope for you too! Feed your mind with truth. Pay attention to what your body tells you. Forgive those who have said hurtful things to you. Practice implementing these three tips every day and you will overcome CF, disease, and this issue of weight!

Child of God, loving wife, mom to her Shih Tzu Ajah, daughter, business owner, and artist are only a few of the countless hats Mandy B. Anderson wears on a daily basis. She is an overcomer and a goal achiever. Mandy walks the walk. She has brightened the lives of many with her smile and gifts of beauty, encouragement, and order. As you listen to her music and story, may it inspire and bless you as it has many others. Receive your free copy today of Mandy's song "Still Breathing" at http://www.mandybanderson.com/.

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